Top 10 tips of How To Make Friends in High School in your life who will support you, be there for you in difficult times, help you succeed in your life.
One of the best sayings that describe a true friendship is “It’s not who you know the longest, It’s about who came and never left your side”.
If you are struggling to make friends in high school than I clearly understand your problem. Sometimes the direct approach of walking to some students and saying “Hey do you want my to be friends !” will only drive others away from you. I am going to give you some useful tips on how to approach people and make friends and your overall experience much better.
As the time of our first day at high school comes near we all get the feeling of that nervousness and excitement. If you are looking at the tips to make new friends in high school as a freshman or sophomore or junior or senior then I have just what you need.
Going through the high school in one important period of your life. And as fresher it is just the start of a new journey ahead. You will find friends that will remain by your side till the senior year and also some friends that are there as a just acquaintance and you only meet them when you have some specific works. But, remember making a friend that is by your side will just ease the life of the high school and make it more fun and exciting. Also, we are social creatures by nature and drive most of our values and beliefs from the interpersonal relationships that we have with other people.
So when you were kid it was pretty easier to make friends it was like being close to other kid within the reachable proxy and then you gotta ask “do you wanna be my friend “ after that you have a friend. But as you grow into a more mature person you find that your all friends have moved away to pursue their career or you had to pursue yours or either you have don’t have many friends because of your shy nature. Then the time comes when you have to move to high school and you start to recognize that it’s a whole new kingdom. So you then have to formulate some strategies to make friends because your friend making strategy as a child is now not efficient.
So as a child you had got friends by having others kids near your proxy but as you grow up to find yourself around people of your interest, your friends from the earlier year starts become casual acquaintance. Now when you come to high school to will find that some of your pre-high school friends will maintain the friendship and keep in touch, these may be some people who you grew up with, you may continue to contact them and meet them but, there is whole new dilemma! You have got no friends where you are right now, and that is high school.
So hang on tight with me as I discuss along with the best advice and experience that worked for me and others in high school years.
How to start the conversation
When you come out of summer breaks you have many experiences and stories to share such as the places you visited, the video games that you played, the mysterious that you solved online, the books you read all amazing adventures that helped you to become better. So when making friends and approaching someone new these are the topics that you want to keep on the table be willing to talk about all the fun stuff that you did over your summer breaks.
So if you are not coming from summer breaks and is in the middle year than also you can talk about various interesting subjects and different things that you do like the movies you watch, the video games that you play and the hobbies that you have.
The only way to build momentum in any communication is by forming patterns of things you say and listening to the things others say and asking others questions. Asking others questions will also help to get people interested in talks and becoming more open.
Introduce yourself to New People
As the new year of the school starts their tends to be a student that has just joined and also if you are a freshman everyone in the school is new to you this will give you the opportunity to talk to everyone. Also if you are meeting some new students who have just joined your school, they don’t really know anyone around and are fresh to the experience of the surroundings. New Students are looking for someone to become their friends and thus it makes it much easier to make friends with them. Introduce yourself to New Students and they will try to fit in and become your friends too. Just ask about their hobbies or the things they like make them feel comfortable and you will have a good friend in no time.
Talking to Kids in the classroom
Before the teacher comes in the class usually kids gather around each other or sit around the desks that give you a perfect opportunity to turn to your left or turn to your right and find someone to talk to at that moment you have a small window to communicate before the teaches arrives. Don’t worry if the communication goes to places out of your interest or awkward talks you know the teacher will come and take the lectures and you have to eventually focus in the classroom. But if the conversation goes as aspected and both of you have a nice chat then you can continue your talks when the class ends end in the lunch breaks and start building that momentum of friendship, you can chat every time the class ends and keep building the friendship more.
Join Groups or group by activity in school
These places are the most overlooked area while thinking of making friends People in a group tends to have a common interest in the activities which they are doing it can be a book club or soccer sports team anything which interests you. If you do some work together for a good amount of time then you also tend to become more comfortable around that person, which becomes again a good place to start building friends.
Also when you join a club of your interest the members of the club tend to welcome and receptive to new members when they join. The clubs are made for the reason for the people of the same interest to come together and share their experiences and bond with each other.
Be more just than an acquaintance
These are the people whom you frequently have contacts for some particular reasons only but you do not know about each other much. Maybe you share one or two subjects class with each other or maybe travel together from bus to home, by just being someone who is there for a particular reason you can shift the relationship to friends because you do not know until you explore with them. You will be amazed to discover people who love things of your interest like reading books or playing Fortnite or watching movies and these were the people whom you just only traveled with or met in one class.
By talking more in class, greeting others when you meet shows that you are someone whom they can ask when you require any help or to join the company. The more talking, in general, you do to your classmates makes it clear that you want to be friends with and not some awkward and shy person whom the other may think what will happen if I say HI to him. You only become approachable by having an inviting personality, so surely want those doors to remain open. Be Genuine don’t hide your personality of the fears of others.
Be Approachable by Friendly Gestures
When you are friendly it becomes easy for others to approach you and start a conversation. You don’t want other students thinking “I am scared of him… I don’t wanna talk to him…”, this is the last thought you want in other minds when you want to make them friends.
Now, What can you do? Carry a smile when you meet someone, if you approach someone with an energetic handshake and a genuine smile the message is radiated non verbally that you are here as a friend. You may be backed off by the people who just cross their arms and speak such as if there are here for business, You must not carry that persona. You want to be an approachable, nice, and happy person. You don’t want to be sad, angry or miserable.
Open a Conversation
There will be various situation in your high school when can have the chance to be with someone for a task or simply in a community. You just have to initiate the conversation, it is easy if you are in a community with similar interest, all you have to do is ask a question related to any mutual interest topic.
But the real scenario is in unfamiliar domains where you don’t know much about a person. Then the best ways to start the conversation may be by small talks about weather or sports, ask the person a favor, have a joke, or even a good observation will be enough to begin the talk. If the person starts more conversation then you must listen to them carefully, also don’t push others if they don’t wanna open up, There are many who will love to talk to you.
Common and Compliments
This may be the perhaps best way to spark the conversation and building the momentum to get the conversation going. Complimenting the person on something of mutual interest will definitely make a friend because your value system is the same.
Like if you love fashions and have a good sense of dressing then what is the wait! , go to someone and give them genuine compliments about their outfits and tell them exactly how their dressing sense is amazing. Be thoughtful and genuine in your praise don’t butter it and make it cheap, that’s why make sure to compliment about something that you know yourself. The conversation will get so much a good momentum that you will want to do follow-up conservation later.
Take participation in Group Activity
If the class has a group project in which the class requires the participation of members than there is an opportunity to know other people and become friends. You can say the other classmates are in forced proxy to hang out with you for the work you can take it as an opportunity to know about them and make good acquaintances.
This is also a way to enter in a group, you meet a person and then they introduce you to all their friends and then there you are hanging in a group from Just Knowing One Person!!. Mostly your high school squads are made this way, you are introduced to one girl at a table in class become friends with her and so she introduced you to all her friends now all of you become good friends to each other. BAM theirs a SQUAD!!. Just by sitting next to the person and talking to them, this is how students make friends through Mutual Friends and Friends of Friends.
Don’t be Shy if you are NEW
People and Students will love to talk to you and know about you. Don’t feel nervous about sitting in a group and talking to anyone because you don’t. Just be friendly and ask about the building or curriculum or what is the best place in the college or which is the best lesson to attend to, they will love to give their opinions and even tell you some great things that will help you to start to discover around. Students love to meet new students to talk to and have different topics of interest. Don’t feel shy about being new and not talking to anyone. If you are new trust me you will have much more to talk to then talking to usual friends.
Reintroduce Yourself at Last
Like saying phrase at the end of conversations “My Name is Jack. What was yours?” helps the name of the person you are talking to stick in your mind, especially when you are talking people in groups. This method will help the names to stick in mind and others remember you as well, and it is also very important to remember the name if you hope to see them in the future and go further into friendship. You may annoy another person also if you keep on constantly asking them their name instead you can apply this trick that I use when some person tells their name I immediately think of somebody else I know with the same name and picture them and this trick helped me remember many names and I am sure will help you too.
Accepting the Invitations from others
This is one of the important facts that I personally felt. When you are around a group they will decide to hang out or study or other activities and there are good chances that they will also invite you to their plan. And it is that moment you will become a permanent part of the group or even a friend. The constant rejections to their invitation will eventually tell them that you are someone who is just around for some particular reason and really not interested to in working with a group, and this will cause the group to eventually alienate you and then you will come to know that the reason to this was the rejections.
There was this woman who just had her husband died in a car accident as a result of which she started to avoid talking to other people or go in public and she self-isolated herself for weeks slowly there were no calls and she started slipping in depression. The New Year came and she decided to take the resolution of accepting all the invitation of her friends and family which she had constantly turned down for months, eventually, she started attending her relatives and friends get together and then it moved to friends of friends get together. At the end of the year, she had completely defeated her self isolation and met some people who became their life long partners. So by just accepting all the invitations and offer others gave she found the best year of her life.
Ask people for a favor
It may be difficult to ask someone to do something only when you just met that person, but you have to take some steps to form friends. You can ask people for some help like completing homework or solving problems that you may have working in the project, you can ask them to meet at someplace later on or to hangout or even ask them to hang out at your home. Only when you ask you can come to know, and that time you have to be willing that step forward. “you gotta ask to get that YES!!”
Maintain the friendship
Once you make friends be sure to maintain the friendship. And I am talking here about being a good friend. Being loyal and trustworthy to your friends, being a good listener to your friends, and being reliable when the time comes. Most important thing is that being yourself because in friendship is the place a person can be his true self and has not to worry about anything about the way they are. Good friends are hard to find you can’t go them searching under the rock with a magnifying glass you have to put yourself in the social position and then experience it and eventually you will find someone who is a very similar person to you.
How to Make Friends in High School When you are shy
Self Doubts and you
Having Self Doubts in mind robs people with the ability to talk to someone. Self-doubt is more of Self illusion where your brain tries to convince you not to face a particular situation where feelings of rejection can be faced. It may try to talk or asking for help. Start to write down these feelings when it comes across and addresses them reasonably because the self-doubts of rejection are all made up in the brain. There is absolutely no reason to fear rejections many successful businessmen are the ones who have tons of cold rejection to their faces and after some point, they also start to develop numbness to rejections and even pursue rejections till the person says YES to them.
Telling yourself that you are not good enough to talk to someone will only lead you to not building connections. The best practice to get self-doubts from your mind in placing some of your achievements in the place where you can see them without avoiding. Give yourself a few minutes before going to the school to think about these achievements that how you were able to do them. You will find yourself able to do anything possible.
Lend a hand to help
If you are shy there is a possibility that you may find it difficult to lend the hand to help when you barely know a person who is in the problem, but compassion is the way to the heart and builds a deeper connection with others. So if someone who sits next to you and has failed the test that you aced then you can offer him help to teach him the subject next time so that with your he can pass the test next time. At the time of such needs, people will rarely say NO to you, this is the perfect opportunity to help them and be their friends.
Follow the rhythm
Once you get to know someone and you both are spending a good time together then this is awesome. Just don’t try to compare the pace of friendship with your other relationships. Like someone may have invited you to sleepovers when you came to know them within a week or two but the new person who you just knew may have not invited you till yet. Don’t let this create doubts about the friendship because everyone has their own pace to trust others based on their past experience and everyone experiences may not be alike. Just give some time because the time will also work as a great ally to form good bonds. The best friendships take time if they can be done in a snap of finger then it can also be undone with the same snap, try to move slow and don’t compare it to someone else’s friendship and embrace the present.
No one is PERFECT
Expect yourself to make mistakes, this thing you have to realize and which also is a barrier to becoming just more than an acquaintance to someone. People do friendships to be loved and understood and feel the sense of belonging they are not some machines who need everything to be perfect, people in friendship embrace the mistakes of each other and helps to make each other better. Always see best in others and try to encourage them to continue what they are doing because finding the perfect person will keep you lonely for a very long time.
Also, have the courage to show someone your downside too. You can’t believe how much it is important for the relationship. All your achievements are good you feel great to show them but this does not make friends. When you tell them what you fear and things that keep you all night can also be an integral part of friendship because when they realize they have similar situations they will understand what you are going through and this will help you form deeper connections with each other.
Showing only perfectness will never help to form deeper friendship it is true with every relationship. Sometimes a parent has a relationship with a child in which the child knows only about their being perfect part like owing a great business and being a taekwondo specialist other things but they never tell that they got bankrupt three times in business before to reach that position because they do not want to how vulnerable they were. Due to this when the child gets bullied, he does not come to father because he wants to be like his father be strong and he tells some false stories to hold up to these expectations and become like his father. These things are just superior in nature if you want to connect to each have the courage to show vulnerabilities at some points.
Benefits of Making Right Friends in High School
1. They support and guide you emotionally:
.You need to find a friend who is willing to provide. Help you consistently. Your friend should be there for you when you are going through difficult emotional times and is there for you at that moment guiding and advising you at the time a good friend will keep a check on you when you are passing through a difficult moment in life and will distract you and will improve your mental state when It is most required
2. Bring the best out of you:
A good friend will always support you in making the best decision in your life and encourage you when you doubt yourself. Instead of trying to talk you out of your decision and bending you in the decision that they agree upon. If you are going to a law school your friend should be celebrating your decision rather convincing you to stay
3. A good communication band:
Another differentiating point for a good. A friend is that you can communicate your feeling and thoughts without hesitating you are comfortable with your friend as the person who you are and not the Person that is demanded by your friend. You should never feel that you have to keep quiet about your opinions and feelings around your friends. Good friends will tell you when you are right and when you are wrong and you should be comfortable to do this in return.
4. Building trust and respect:
Respect is the thing that is shown not when you are present, a good friend will stand for you and support for you when you are not around. You are also able to trust your friend with private information and have faith in them to support you back. You can develop a mutual trust and respect relationship with your friend.
5. Stay away from toxic characters
Sometimes you end up with people who wil2 always. Discourage you by regular commenting on the things you do. They always try to put you down with negative comments. These actions can be. Harmful to your self-esteem and also lower down yourself worth this will lead you to have toxic relationships. A negative friend will try to bring you down by calling you stupid or dumb things and constantly tell you that you are wrong. They will make fun Of you around other people to enjoy themselves stay away from these characters and stay Positive in life.
6. Avoid the takers:
Some friends are there in your life who will Turn themselves when they require you they will only ask for the thing as do not give the same to you. They are not interested when you need them and will fail to show up at the time of Requirement. They may use you emotionally to get something from you. Avoid takers keep a balance between both take and give with your friend
7. Have people in your life who are hungry:
Making friend with people who are focused and determined to achieve their goal are a great source of inspiration that ought to inculcate the same habits in you. They can become your mentor or guru and a person with the caliber to has been a good influence in your life
8. Get energy drainers out of your life:
You should be away from the friends who always keep on focusing on negative stuff or situations as this can end up draining your energy. If your friend is being negative give them Support and cheer them up maybe they are going through a hard phase in life if this doesn’t work and start to cost your mental health, seek new friends, avoid negative people in life or you will end up Using your energy in someone else’s issue_
9. Have a friend with a common goal:
When you make friends with people who have similar goals especially if you are an entrepreneur you can push each other, this will overcome the laziness and help you step up in your progress bar, leading to mutual development. You can work on goals together, synergize your resources, and achieve Faster.
10. Choose a friend who is has a sense of humor.
Friends need to spend a lot of time together you will require a friend who he can laugh with you and not on you. The person who can express their feeling and embrace yours in humorous is a way that relieves you from stress and tension from your life. They don’t put you down for the things that make you different. Have a humorous friend in your life.